Dignity.


The faces that stared back at me were all harsh and unforgiving. A sea of bitterness made that why by relentless struggle and hunger. They all craved retribution, called for my blood, all but one. There he was like a beacon in the night, soft eyes peering out from between wisps of pale blonde hair. These were the eyes of dreams, the kind that promised magic but delivered miracles. These were the kind of eyes that held redemption.

My accuser prodded me forward, pulling me back into the moment. I stumbled and struggled for my balance, the pull back on my chains was immediate. There would be no mercy offered here today, not even in the form of human decency.

I tried not to see the hunger in the crowd’s eyes as I was lead toward the stand. It was hard to tune out. I tried to imagine a private moment when dignity still existed. Then his eyes found me again and he followed along in the crowd like an unmoving yet ever present sun.

I now had something to hold onto as I climbed the steps toward my fate. The Magistrate stood before me purely as a token of a law that no longer mattered. My guilt was already decided by the masses, without a say from me or any that could witness on my behalf. Acting as a witness though would mean a fate worse than my own, and something I would never ask of anyone.

I accepted my fate the moment I made the choice to act. I’d already made peace with my God long before the act was carried out, before I’d offered harbor to the first enemy. Sympathy would not be something I’d receive today but in showing his face this boy had given me a gift I didn’t deserve to hope for. I’d have a memory to live in, one that held hope to keep me from losing who I was while my sentence was carried out.

The magistrate cleared his throat and I prepared for the meager show of civility he tried for before carrying out the will of the people. A will that was manipulated and then rallied by the most corrupt among us.

“Do you have any witnesses?” He asked in a shaky voice.

“I do not.” I responded.

“Do you have any evidence to present?” He asked sounding more nervous.

“I do not.” I repeated.

“Will you not even say anything on your own behalf?” He pleaded. I wondered if he would actually pass a not guilty verdict had I attempted a defense. Though I was the one being sentenced to death, I felt an overwhelming sadness for him.

“I will not lie and say that I did not do what I am being accused of. I will only say that if I had turned my back on those people I would have been breaking the laws that govern humanity and I would be deserving of your punishment. I can go to my grave knowing I did the right thing.” I closed my eyes as I saw the heavy burden was not lifted from the Magistrate by my words.

“Then having no defense for your crimes Annalisa Mancuso I find you guilty of treason a crime that carries the penalty of death. ”

As the hangman walked me toward the gallows I looked out at the faces and astonishingly none seemed hungry for my death. There was even sadness in some eyes. It was then that I realized that the constant face I thought was following me was not just one blonde boy but the crowd was now overrun with them.

Suddenly there was a cry from somewhere in the crowd.

“This is what you call justice?” It called.

No one moved or spoke.

A chant began quietly at first then louder until it became a roar. “Justice!” It called. I glanced at the Magistrate and he returned my questioning look. After a moment he stepped forward.

“What justice would satisfy the people?” He called out more calmly than he’d spoken yet.

“She showed mercy to those who were helpless, she deserves mercy.” I woman’s voice called out and she stepped forward. The crowd was silent for a moment. Then it tensed as those who called for blood were now outnumbered by those who called for mercy.

“Mercy it is then.” The Magistrate breathed. The hangman stood frozen unsure of what to do.

“Well I guess you better let her go.” The Magistrate prodded, bowing to the pressure of the majority.

Hands were around me pulling me to safety and it seemed that the soft eyes that had promised magic truly did deliver miracles.